Okay, he met one Fat Boy.
It's been a while since I've written a proper post on here, so I'm coming with what I'm sure you're all demanding: Larry Larr's love song. "Larry, That's What They Call Me" was Larry's big single from his 1991 debut album, Da Wizzard of Odds on Ruffhouse/ Columbia Records. There was a video and everything. But unfortunately it didn't blow up and by 1992, he was unsigned again. But there was one more single the label before Columbia gave up, proof positive that the label didn't know what to do with this raw talent: "Confused," the token love song every rapper had to do for a major label to prove they were versatile.
That said, Larry was versatile, and he was able to make this song swing. It's not one of those slow, whispered, "hey girl, you know I love you, girl, from the night until the day, girl, until you're mine forever, girl" songs everybody started making since "I Need Love." I mean, he does lay down a bunch of cliches interspersed with the word "girl" a lot in the first verse: "girl, I hate to strut you inside my rap, but girl, you got me hooked; you're all that. I love the way that you look, the way that you walk, the way that you dress and the way that you talk. Girl, I'd like to have you for my own. Girl, I can't help it, let me take you home."
But he's rapping fast on a high energy track with that hard P-funk "zoom" effect X-Clan used to love being constantly cut in by his DJ Mad Ice. It's like a hardcore new jack swing track with live funk guitar and this girl Stephanie Miller singing her heart out for more than just a repeated hook. She gets to delve into some back and forth, reminding me of Kwamé's "Ownlee Eue" or the songs Grand Puba used to do with Mary J Blige. Chuck Nice produced most of the album, but two guys named Craig "Make The Gruve" Caruth and Rob Williams did this one. Which makes sense, since this isn't the kind of Philly street track Larry was the real master of. But honestly, this song works and even manages not to feel out of place on the LP.
If you want to hear an out of place song on that album, check out the CD version which has an exclusive house song called "Get Funky." Wow.
Anyway, that's "Confused." It's super 90's. Like, check out this exchange, "(Larry, I'm sorry; I didn't mean to hurt you.) Girl, I'm cooler than the cat in the Cheetos commercial." But the writing gets better when they get into the meat of the song and why it's called "Confused." It's about young, capricious lovers cheating and naively wounding each other. Stephanie really killed it here. I tried looking her up online but apparently she didn't take off like she really should've. Discogs links one or two credits many years later, and I'm pretty suspicious that it's a different Stephanie Miller. But it surely didn't help her that Columbia kicked her off the single.
Yeah, "Confused" is an album track, but the single is notable because it has exclusive remixes that it puts first. I have the CD single, which has all the same versions, but the 12" single has a B-side called "Keep On Y'all," which is right off of the album. The back cover credits vocals by EST, but disappointingly, he doesn't rap on it; he just comes in to do the shout outs at the end. It's a slick song, though, and the kind of thing Larry's fans really wanted from him; it makes a lot of sense to see it on the B-side. Alternatively, the CD-single just has a bonus radio edit. Otherwise, the two's track-listing's are the same.
So let's get to the Fat Boy already! Yeah, who's an artist you'd least expect to turn up and remix Larry Larr? Prince Markie Dee and the Soul Convention? Well, it fits considering this is a 1991 new jack love rap. Yes, the two Marks have gotten on board not just to remix but "Remake" it. They'd already started making a name for themselves producing this kind of stuff for Father MC, but this was before "Real Love" and before they came out with any of their albums and people had really caught on that Prince Markie Dee had reinvented himself outside of the Fat Boys. But they've turned it into a real Soul Convention song, with their signature piano and completely replacing all of Miller's vocals with their own whole group of uncredited R&B girls. And honestly, they're good, too, riffing and crooning behind all of Larry's verses besides just the parts in between. They've turned it into a sweeter song, though they keep some of the original percussive elements and "zoom" effect, stretching it out to over six and a half minutes with lots of solos and extended choruses.
They even made a music video for it, though I don't remember ever seeing it on Rap City back in the day. It's cut down considerably to a more traditional radio-friendly length (and yes, shorter than the Radio Edit on the CD single). So you don't really get the Soul free-for-all vibe of the full-length version, which lets the girls open the song acapella and take over the last few minutes until it's almost a gospel song, except instead of professing eternal love for Jesus, they beg for Larry's forgiveness. It's actually kind of epic.
There's also a Hip-Hop Mix of "Confused," also by Mr. Make the Gruve. Instrumentally it's pretty dope, just layering in a bunch of classic breaks and samples. It's got the famous Lyn Collins "Think" break, famous as Rob Base's "Woo! Yeah!" "It Takes Two" beat, as well as the "Mardi Gras" bells. It's got some "Let's Dance" in there and that sick shredded electric guitar sample Professor Griff used for "Pawns In the Game." It's dope, even though Larry's relationship raps don't really fit. But it really falls apart when they try to lay Stephanie's vocals on them and they don't gel at all. It's pure tissue rejection. Too bad they didn't set Larry's "Get Funky" vocals to this instead.
But anyway, yeah, this didn't work out for Larry Larr. He got dropped. But things went better for Prince Markie Dee, who'd go on to produce a host of A-list artists and sign to Motown to release his own albums with the Convention. It's a shame he didn't reach back out to Larry and fit him into Love Daddy somewhere. But then again, they probably wouldn't've been able to recreate the magic they got here. Because this single's surprisingly good. So actually, maybe it would've been better if Stephanie Miller joined the Soul Convention. Then again, maybe she did. I don't think those girls tended to get all their credits on those albums.
Showing posts with label Fat Boys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fat Boys. Show all posts
Saturday, March 11, 2023
Tuesday, January 21, 2020
The Fat Boys' Hardest Gangsta Raps
(I hate when critics of Hip-Hop lay "Cop Killer" on our doorstep. That's a heavy metal song on a heavy metal album by a heavy metal band. I don't listen to that noise! But, to be fair, it's not like we haven't got a few violent gangster tales of our own... like these, told by The Fat Boys. Youtube version is here.)
Tuesday, May 30, 2017
Top 13 Horror Movie Closing Credit Raps
There's nothing more entertaining, or perhaps cringe-worthy, then when a scary film ends and suddenly somebody starts rapping over the closing credits. You actually don't see it very often, because metal is the traditional music genre of horror movies, at least in the 80s and 90s, when great horror films and great horror songs mostly came together. So, when you did come across it, it really stood out. Rapping during closing credits is a little tradition that started more in comedies, including such classic moments as Goldie Hawn and LL Cool J passing the mic back and forth in Wildcats, Tom Hanks and Dan Aykroyd exchanging verses in character at the end of Dragnet, John Leguizamo living up to his title in The Pest, or the starts of Richard Linklater's entire cast making goofy rap video at the end of Everybody Wants Some.
But that's comedy; you've seen it a million times in sitcoms, novelty records, commercials, etc. The joke, inevitably, is: look, these milquetoast nerds have no natural rhythm, but they're rapping anyway! Ha ha. Thirty years of the same joke. But in horror movies, expectations are different. The mood is dark and serious. The raps... should be good, right? At least sometimes. So here's my criteria of what I'm looking for in my Top 13.
Legit horror movies: Ideally these should be horror movies with some credibility, that horror fans would actually watch and respect. Da Hip-Hop Witch doesn't count, and neither do horror parodies (I see you, Scary Movie, but you're not making this list).
Legit rappers: It's not essential, because there are some rap amateurs that just need to be included, but they definitely at least get bonus points if they rope genuine, known Hip-Hop recording artists with careers and albums into participating.
Relating to the movie: We want horror movie raps, not just rap songs that somehow got plastered onto a horror movie soundtrack. Kool Moe Dee wrapping up Nightmare On Elm St. 5 was exciting for a minute, until you realize he's just talking about LL Cool J, not Freddy Kreuger. The closer the lyrics of the song tie into the film, the better!
...Or at least horror-themed: Short of relating to the movie, I at least want some horrorcore, spitting lyrics about ghosts and decapitations. We want spookiness, in tone with the movie we just watched, not just some teenager bragging about his car, or some old Steady B love song because the film company had a blanket deal with the record label (I see you, Ghost In the Machine).
Placement: I'm looking for a real theme, here, not just a song tucked deep in the film's soundtrack. Hearing two notes as a character drives up in his car like Trespass is lame. I want songs that play in the film's credits, preferably on their own, because they're the final element to the film's telling of the story, not some afterthought.
You feel me, right? I think these are reasonable expectations. So without further ado, let's jump into
13. Dr. Hackenstein's "The Hackenstein Rap" (1989. Available on wax? Yes!) - This one's at the bottom of the list because it's loose with some of the criteria. Dr. Hackenstein is clearly sort of a horror parody, and there's no real rappers on here (just composer Claude Lehenaff with female vocalist Karen Clark). But how could I leave it off? The song was released on 12" with a glorious picture cover, which is better known now than the original film that spawned it. "The Hackenstein Rap" itself is fairly disco-y, and there's at least as much singing as there is rapping; but it's pretty dang fun, and definitely works as a theme for the film with a chorus that goes, "he wants your body for his wife; he wants to bring her back to life, yeah!" There's even an exclusive remix on the 12".
12. Scream 2's "Scream" (1997. Available on wax? Sort of! The soundtrack was released on CD and cassette, and there's a bootleg white label pressing of this particular song.) - Points deducted for not making it on the original Scream's soundtrack, and even more points deducted for lyrics that have nothing to do with film-obsessed serial killers. But they got Master P (and Silkk the Shocker) to release a "Scream" song when they were at the peaks of their careers, so that's pretty impressive. They just rap about how hard they had it growing up, but there is a scream sound effect in the hook, and in the music video (yes, there was a music video for this), they rap in front of the iconic Scream mask and mix in some cool Mardi Gras death mask imagery. It's just too bad the song sucks, particularly the way P lays his "uggh" sound into the screaming hook, killing the energy of it.
11. Seed of Chucky's "Cut It Up" (2005. Available on wax? No, but the soundtrack album's available on CD with this song on it.) - This song would be higher on the list if this were anywhere close to the original Child's Play, but I'm letting my prejudice against the later Chucky films hold it down. There was actually a sort of rap song planned for the original film's soundtrack, but they decided not to use it at the last minute. But we got this! Fredwreck (yes, the guy who used to produce The B.U.M.s) gets busy over the film's closing credits, and yes, his song is all about Chucky. Of course, we all know they should've gotten Bushwick Bill and Gangksta N.I.P. for this; but hey, these guys really seem to understand the appeal of a horror movie rap theme and go for the gold. So they earned their place on this list.
10. Popcorn's "Scary, Scary Movies" (1991. Available on wax? Nope.) - This film reaches #10 primarily for being such a fan favorite horror film with the peculiar sensibilities to end in a rap. So it's a beloved moment for fans, and they pay homage to horror films with a lot of enthusiasm, but they're hardly great MCs. Like a couple other songs on the soundtrack, it's performed by Ossie D & Stevie G, a reggae duo who were certainly good sports and rapped "American" for this one, using rough, grimy voices to include some amusing, specific references to the film like, "blood sucking insects hanging from a rope, get electrocuted by the Shock-O-Scope!"
9. Phantasm RaVager's "Reggie Rap" (2016. Available on wax? No.) - Yes, Phantasm recently came back with a new sequel, and this time they ended with a rap song. It's performed by somebody named Elvis Brown who has a Soundcloud with more of his songs here, and the "Reggie" of the title refers to the series' hero Reggie, who travels the country, pursuing The Tall Man with his four-barrel shotgun. It scores some big points for being an enthusiastic horror rap and crafting lyrics that stick tight to the films, but loses some for autotune and Doug E. Fresh having beaten them to the punch of turning the Phantasm theme into a rap song by about 30 years.
8. The Fear's "Morty's Theme" (1994. Available on wax? Hell yes!) - The only reason this entry isn't even higher on the list is that it's such a crap, disappointing film. The premise is cool: a bunch of characters gather together to face their fears in a weird therapy session, but their fears all come to life and take them out, ultimately personified by a wooden man they call Morty. Wes Craven cameo'd in it, and I know I wasn't the only one who thought this was going to be good; but it wound up being cheap and dumb. Mostly dumb, with really bad acting. Admittedly, the even worse sequel made this film look a little better by comparison, but nope. Not nearly enough. Anyway, the soundtrack album is an essential who's who of horrorcore, including tracks by everybody from The Gravediggaz to The Headless Horsemen. And the ultimate honor of crafting the film's titular theme song fell to horrorcore legend himself, Esham. And it kind of rocks, managing to bring Morty and the film's story into the verses without making it seem like a gimmicky novelty rap.
7. Lunatics: A Love Story's "The Reynolds Rap" (Available on wax? No.) - It was hard to decide where to put this one on the list, but ultimately I felt it belonged pretty squarely in the middle. The main thing holding it back is that this is just barely a horror movie, if it qualifies at all. But it's definitely a cult film by horror veterans with some strong horror elements. Essentially Ted Raimi is a lunatic, who meets a beautiful woman and falls in love when he realizes she's crazy, too. But to be with her, he has to venture outside of his apartment and battle all of his delusions he encounters along the way, including a giant killer spider and Bruce Campbell as an evil doctor. Helping this song immensely is the fact that director Josh Becker hired the legit, underground rap group Detroit's Most Wanted ("City of Boom" was probably their best known record) to perform his lyrics. Better still, this film doesn't just play uninterrupted in the film's closing credits (though it does), DMW also appear in the film as themselves, assaulting Raimi with their rhymes in his crazy fever dreams.
6. Monster Squad's "Monster Squad Rap" (1987. Available on wax? You bet.) - Look, Monster Squad is a silly but high quality, quite enjoyable movie. So the fact that the "Monster Squad Rap" is super corny is appropriate. Anyway, that's my excuse for having such a bad rap this high on the list. I mean, say what you want, but fans treasure it, as evidenced by the fact that this soundtrack has been repressed on wax several times in the last couple of years. The rock-ish hook and clunky rapping is super cheesy but catchy in a way that's perfect for a movie where a bunch of kids team up with Frankenstein's monster to save the world from Dracula and The Creature From the Black Lagoon. Put alongside serious Hip-Hop, sure it's tripe; but it's an essential component of a great horror flick for young adults.
5. Maniac Cop 2's "Maniac Cop Rap" (1989. Available on wax? Yes!) - I once got to ask William Lustig about who the actual rappers were on the "Maniac Cop Rap," but unfortunately he didn't remember. Just some guys that composer Jay Chattaway brought in for the day. According to the credits themselves, they're Yeshua (Josh) Barnes and Brian (B. Dub) Woods. Anyway, everyone deserves credit for making a rip roaring rap theme for this rare sequel that's even better than its predecessor, with Josh and B kicking fun raps about the killer cop ("when he shows up, he's supposed to protect ya, but Maniac Cop is out to get ya. He's an anti-vigilante and they can't convict him, so watch out, Jack, 'cause you're the next victim!") over a beat that makes excellent use of Chattaway's classic theme from the original. This blew my mind when I first heard it pop up in the credits back in the 80s, and I'm still not completely over it.
4. Deep Blue Sea's "Deepest Bluest" (1999. Available on wax? Of course, and you already own it.) - No surprise to see this on the list! This song's pretty bit infamous, though it helps a lot if you recognize the line, "my hat is like a shark's fin" from his 1988 classic "I'm Bad." Anyway, this whole movie is famous for being enjoyably dumb. It's about super genius sharks fighting underwater scientists, and LL Cool J plays a ridiculous cook with a parrot as his only friend. Samuel Jackson has one of the most famous deaths in film history, and this clearly inspired the whole Sharknado and rip-offs craze that swept the nation. But still, LL's theme song managed to outshine it all. There's a 12", a music video and everything. LL's mostly just rapping about being a vicious rapper, and doing a genuinely good job of it, and incorporating the film's violent shark imagery to do it. Unfortunately, that hat line struck everyone as so silly, it went down in history as a joke song. But that also secured its place in history - it's certainly the most famous song on this list - so I guess he can't complain.
3. Waxwork II's "Lost In Time" (1992. Available on wax? No, but the music video's included on the latest blu-ray release.) - I'm tempted to list this even higher, but I realize the world may not appreciate this quite as much as I do. Director Anthony Hickox brought in The LA Posse, the group that spawned Breeze and The Lady of Rage, to perform the theme song. Does it follow the film's plot? Oh yes, and they deserve extra credit for that, given how eccentric this film's plot is. Better still, Hickox directed a complete music video for the song that plays over the credits, so The LA Posse are rapping in the film's many exotic locations, and the movie's stars, including Gremlin's Zach Galligan, are dancing with the posse. The beat's pretty dope, too; though the ridiculous lyrics prevent it from being taken seriously at all. But as part of Waxwork II, which is itself quite tongue-in-cheek, it works!
2. Hood of Horror's "Welcome To the Hood of Horror" (2006. Available on wax? No.) - Look, I was pretty disappointed that Snoop Dogg's Nightmare On Elm St knock-off Bones couldn't make this list. It does have a a good rap theme song ("The Legend of Jimmy Bones" by Snoop, Ren & RBX, and produced by Seed of Chucky's Fredwreck), but they don't play it over the credits or anything. Instead, Snoop closes the show with a generic song called "Dogg Named Snoop," which has nothing to do with the film or anything horror-themed at all. But fortunately he fixes that with his second horror film, Hood Of Horror, where he pulls a Waxwork II, making a whole video for the song to play under the credits. Unfortunately, the movie's not the best; and it's not exactly one of Snoop's greatest hits, but he comes off pretty well over a slow, dark beat. It would fit in nicely on any horror mixtape.
1. Nightmare On Elm St 4's "Are You Ready for Freddy" (1988. Available on wax? For sure!) - I know The Fat Boys were too crossover and kid-friendly to please some heads, but they were genuinely talented. Granted, this was past the time they started working with credible producers like Kurtis Blow and Marley Marl and were drifting into major label rock guys' hands, but they still knocked it out the park with this one. I mean, they actually got Robert Englund to rap in character as Freddy on this one. And I love the detailed lyrics that really show they're intimately familiar with the films ("even in part three, the dream warriors failed, and Mr. Big Time Freddy Krueger prevailed. It was just about that time, I know you'll never forget what he did to the girl with the TV set!"), which is more than you can say for most soundtrack songs, horror or otherwise. You've got Buff beatboxing, a music video with the real Freddy in it, and they work the film's original soundtrack expertly into their instrumental - what's not to love?
Honorable Mentions:
Bad Biology's "So You Wanna Make a Movie" (2008. Available on wax? No.) - Frank Henonletter, the man who made Basket Case, made his comeback with a film co-written by RA the Rugged Man. RA's been referencing Henenlotter's work for decades, and appeared on some of his DVD special features, so it was only a matter of time until they made a movie together, I guess. Unfortunately, the film's weird mix of exploitative horror and trashy Hip-Hop sensibilities just added up to something juvenile and disappointing. I mean, Vinnie Paz's acting is just like you'd think it would be. But given his participation, it was a given RA would also have a rap song for the credits, but it's not really about Bad Biology's story. Maybe that's just as well in this case. Instead it's about the hardships of making an independent film, in essence a theme song about the making of this film. That's an original slant, props for that, but by the time you hear it in its context, it just feels like more of everything that went wrong with this picture.
13 Ghosts' "Mirror Mirror" (2001. Available on wax? Nah.) - Neither a great movie nor a great rap theme song, but at least they tried. Rah Digga, who played a sizeable supporting role in the film, naturally comes back to rap up the closing credits. Unfortunately, it's not about the film's plot or horror at all; it's just about overcoming life's challenges. She does make a reference to seeing her grandmother again, like a ghost, and there's a little theremin-like sound in the track, so it feels like she's throwing in little token semi-references to the movie, but that's even worse, because it just makes it feel like a lazy, half-assed song. Like, be about ghosts or don't, but don't try to play both sides of the fence. Nice try, but nobody wants to hear club raps like "I can live like a baller" on a bloody horror movie.
Leprechaun In the Hood's "Ride Or Die" (2000. Available on wax? No.) - Obviously this movie had to get at least a mention. It's a campy mash0-up of horror and "hood" movies with a rapper named Postermaster P for a main character and Ice-T in a leading role. Leprechaun himself even raps at the end of the movie... but before the closing credits and the film's underwhelming outro song by some dudes called The Boom Brothers. It's not great, but they do at least include the leprechaun in their lyrics. Interestingly, Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood (the sixth actual Leprechaun movie) just plays traditional score over its closing credits, although of course it does have some rap on its soundtrack, including a song by Zion I.
Other films that didn't make the list but rate a mention include Psycho 3, which has a very strange little rap song tucked away on its soundtrack called "Dirty Street." Shark Night ends with a music video that starts after the closing credits where the film's lead actors make a terrible rap video (though fitting with the film's campy, junk TV nature). And Japanese pop rock band Sekai no Owari pretty much rapped (in English, no less) through the closing credits rap Attack On the Titan with their song called "Anti Hero," guest produced by Dan the Automator. But it's more iffy if the film counts as horror (it's more of a dystopian YA fantasy actioner), then if the song counts as Hip-Hop.
Also there was a 2000 film called The Convent, which I naively saw at a screening when I was young enough to believe that when the producers said their film was just like Evil Dead to expect something comparable. Anyway, Coolio had a small role in it as a cop, and the film ends with an original closing credits rap by him called "Show Me Love." But it wasn't a horror-related song at all, and a couple years later, he wound up sticking it on one of his albums called El Cool Magnifico.
Besides Scary Movie, there are other horror-related comedies with rap themes, including Ghostbusters II, which had songs by both Run DMC and Doug E Fresh. And there's the Addams Family movies, which made music videos and everything for their theme songs by Hammer and Tag Team. The screenshot at the top of this article is from M. Night Shymalan's The Visit (an unacknowledged knock-off of the 80's movie Grandmother's House), where the lead kid raps us out during the closing credits.
And finally, no I didn't forget. Tales From the Hood. What a disappointment. It should've had a soundtrack like The Fear, only with even bigger artists, which it sort of did. But instead of horrorcore/ scary songs, it's just dark hardcore and gangsta rap. The closing credits play Scarface/ Face Mob, and the title track is by Domino, who doesn't wind up rapping about anything scary at all, let alone something having to do with the actual film. Admittedly, it's a solid soundtrack album just taken as a collection of original songs by the day's biggest rap artists; but I just can't shake how let down I felt that it copped out since the day I first bought it.
But that's comedy; you've seen it a million times in sitcoms, novelty records, commercials, etc. The joke, inevitably, is: look, these milquetoast nerds have no natural rhythm, but they're rapping anyway! Ha ha. Thirty years of the same joke. But in horror movies, expectations are different. The mood is dark and serious. The raps... should be good, right? At least sometimes. So here's my criteria of what I'm looking for in my Top 13.
Legit horror movies: Ideally these should be horror movies with some credibility, that horror fans would actually watch and respect. Da Hip-Hop Witch doesn't count, and neither do horror parodies (I see you, Scary Movie, but you're not making this list).
Legit rappers: It's not essential, because there are some rap amateurs that just need to be included, but they definitely at least get bonus points if they rope genuine, known Hip-Hop recording artists with careers and albums into participating.
Relating to the movie: We want horror movie raps, not just rap songs that somehow got plastered onto a horror movie soundtrack. Kool Moe Dee wrapping up Nightmare On Elm St. 5 was exciting for a minute, until you realize he's just talking about LL Cool J, not Freddy Kreuger. The closer the lyrics of the song tie into the film, the better!
...Or at least horror-themed: Short of relating to the movie, I at least want some horrorcore, spitting lyrics about ghosts and decapitations. We want spookiness, in tone with the movie we just watched, not just some teenager bragging about his car, or some old Steady B love song because the film company had a blanket deal with the record label (I see you, Ghost In the Machine).
Placement: I'm looking for a real theme, here, not just a song tucked deep in the film's soundtrack. Hearing two notes as a character drives up in his car like Trespass is lame. I want songs that play in the film's credits, preferably on their own, because they're the final element to the film's telling of the story, not some afterthought.
You feel me, right? I think these are reasonable expectations. So without further ado, let's jump into
Top 13 Horror Movies With Closing Credit Raps:
13. Dr. Hackenstein's "The Hackenstein Rap" (1989. Available on wax? Yes!) - This one's at the bottom of the list because it's loose with some of the criteria. Dr. Hackenstein is clearly sort of a horror parody, and there's no real rappers on here (just composer Claude Lehenaff with female vocalist Karen Clark). But how could I leave it off? The song was released on 12" with a glorious picture cover, which is better known now than the original film that spawned it. "The Hackenstein Rap" itself is fairly disco-y, and there's at least as much singing as there is rapping; but it's pretty dang fun, and definitely works as a theme for the film with a chorus that goes, "he wants your body for his wife; he wants to bring her back to life, yeah!" There's even an exclusive remix on the 12".
12. Scream 2's "Scream" (1997. Available on wax? Sort of! The soundtrack was released on CD and cassette, and there's a bootleg white label pressing of this particular song.) - Points deducted for not making it on the original Scream's soundtrack, and even more points deducted for lyrics that have nothing to do with film-obsessed serial killers. But they got Master P (and Silkk the Shocker) to release a "Scream" song when they were at the peaks of their careers, so that's pretty impressive. They just rap about how hard they had it growing up, but there is a scream sound effect in the hook, and in the music video (yes, there was a music video for this), they rap in front of the iconic Scream mask and mix in some cool Mardi Gras death mask imagery. It's just too bad the song sucks, particularly the way P lays his "uggh" sound into the screaming hook, killing the energy of it.
11. Seed of Chucky's "Cut It Up" (2005. Available on wax? No, but the soundtrack album's available on CD with this song on it.) - This song would be higher on the list if this were anywhere close to the original Child's Play, but I'm letting my prejudice against the later Chucky films hold it down. There was actually a sort of rap song planned for the original film's soundtrack, but they decided not to use it at the last minute. But we got this! Fredwreck (yes, the guy who used to produce The B.U.M.s) gets busy over the film's closing credits, and yes, his song is all about Chucky. Of course, we all know they should've gotten Bushwick Bill and Gangksta N.I.P. for this; but hey, these guys really seem to understand the appeal of a horror movie rap theme and go for the gold. So they earned their place on this list.
10. Popcorn's "Scary, Scary Movies" (1991. Available on wax? Nope.) - This film reaches #10 primarily for being such a fan favorite horror film with the peculiar sensibilities to end in a rap. So it's a beloved moment for fans, and they pay homage to horror films with a lot of enthusiasm, but they're hardly great MCs. Like a couple other songs on the soundtrack, it's performed by Ossie D & Stevie G, a reggae duo who were certainly good sports and rapped "American" for this one, using rough, grimy voices to include some amusing, specific references to the film like, "blood sucking insects hanging from a rope, get electrocuted by the Shock-O-Scope!"
9. Phantasm RaVager's "Reggie Rap" (2016. Available on wax? No.) - Yes, Phantasm recently came back with a new sequel, and this time they ended with a rap song. It's performed by somebody named Elvis Brown who has a Soundcloud with more of his songs here, and the "Reggie" of the title refers to the series' hero Reggie, who travels the country, pursuing The Tall Man with his four-barrel shotgun. It scores some big points for being an enthusiastic horror rap and crafting lyrics that stick tight to the films, but loses some for autotune and Doug E. Fresh having beaten them to the punch of turning the Phantasm theme into a rap song by about 30 years.

6. Monster Squad's "Monster Squad Rap" (1987. Available on wax? You bet.) - Look, Monster Squad is a silly but high quality, quite enjoyable movie. So the fact that the "Monster Squad Rap" is super corny is appropriate. Anyway, that's my excuse for having such a bad rap this high on the list. I mean, say what you want, but fans treasure it, as evidenced by the fact that this soundtrack has been repressed on wax several times in the last couple of years. The rock-ish hook and clunky rapping is super cheesy but catchy in a way that's perfect for a movie where a bunch of kids team up with Frankenstein's monster to save the world from Dracula and The Creature From the Black Lagoon. Put alongside serious Hip-Hop, sure it's tripe; but it's an essential component of a great horror flick for young adults.
5. Maniac Cop 2's "Maniac Cop Rap" (1989. Available on wax? Yes!) - I once got to ask William Lustig about who the actual rappers were on the "Maniac Cop Rap," but unfortunately he didn't remember. Just some guys that composer Jay Chattaway brought in for the day. According to the credits themselves, they're Yeshua (Josh) Barnes and Brian (B. Dub) Woods. Anyway, everyone deserves credit for making a rip roaring rap theme for this rare sequel that's even better than its predecessor, with Josh and B kicking fun raps about the killer cop ("when he shows up, he's supposed to protect ya, but Maniac Cop is out to get ya. He's an anti-vigilante and they can't convict him, so watch out, Jack, 'cause you're the next victim!") over a beat that makes excellent use of Chattaway's classic theme from the original. This blew my mind when I first heard it pop up in the credits back in the 80s, and I'm still not completely over it.
4. Deep Blue Sea's "Deepest Bluest" (1999. Available on wax? Of course, and you already own it.) - No surprise to see this on the list! This song's pretty bit infamous, though it helps a lot if you recognize the line, "my hat is like a shark's fin" from his 1988 classic "I'm Bad." Anyway, this whole movie is famous for being enjoyably dumb. It's about super genius sharks fighting underwater scientists, and LL Cool J plays a ridiculous cook with a parrot as his only friend. Samuel Jackson has one of the most famous deaths in film history, and this clearly inspired the whole Sharknado and rip-offs craze that swept the nation. But still, LL's theme song managed to outshine it all. There's a 12", a music video and everything. LL's mostly just rapping about being a vicious rapper, and doing a genuinely good job of it, and incorporating the film's violent shark imagery to do it. Unfortunately, that hat line struck everyone as so silly, it went down in history as a joke song. But that also secured its place in history - it's certainly the most famous song on this list - so I guess he can't complain.
3. Waxwork II's "Lost In Time" (1992. Available on wax? No, but the music video's included on the latest blu-ray release.) - I'm tempted to list this even higher, but I realize the world may not appreciate this quite as much as I do. Director Anthony Hickox brought in The LA Posse, the group that spawned Breeze and The Lady of Rage, to perform the theme song. Does it follow the film's plot? Oh yes, and they deserve extra credit for that, given how eccentric this film's plot is. Better still, Hickox directed a complete music video for the song that plays over the credits, so The LA Posse are rapping in the film's many exotic locations, and the movie's stars, including Gremlin's Zach Galligan, are dancing with the posse. The beat's pretty dope, too; though the ridiculous lyrics prevent it from being taken seriously at all. But as part of Waxwork II, which is itself quite tongue-in-cheek, it works!
2. Hood of Horror's "Welcome To the Hood of Horror" (2006. Available on wax? No.) - Look, I was pretty disappointed that Snoop Dogg's Nightmare On Elm St knock-off Bones couldn't make this list. It does have a a good rap theme song ("The Legend of Jimmy Bones" by Snoop, Ren & RBX, and produced by Seed of Chucky's Fredwreck), but they don't play it over the credits or anything. Instead, Snoop closes the show with a generic song called "Dogg Named Snoop," which has nothing to do with the film or anything horror-themed at all. But fortunately he fixes that with his second horror film, Hood Of Horror, where he pulls a Waxwork II, making a whole video for the song to play under the credits. Unfortunately, the movie's not the best; and it's not exactly one of Snoop's greatest hits, but he comes off pretty well over a slow, dark beat. It would fit in nicely on any horror mixtape.
1. Nightmare On Elm St 4's "Are You Ready for Freddy" (1988. Available on wax? For sure!) - I know The Fat Boys were too crossover and kid-friendly to please some heads, but they were genuinely talented. Granted, this was past the time they started working with credible producers like Kurtis Blow and Marley Marl and were drifting into major label rock guys' hands, but they still knocked it out the park with this one. I mean, they actually got Robert Englund to rap in character as Freddy on this one. And I love the detailed lyrics that really show they're intimately familiar with the films ("even in part three, the dream warriors failed, and Mr. Big Time Freddy Krueger prevailed. It was just about that time, I know you'll never forget what he did to the girl with the TV set!"), which is more than you can say for most soundtrack songs, horror or otherwise. You've got Buff beatboxing, a music video with the real Freddy in it, and they work the film's original soundtrack expertly into their instrumental - what's not to love?
Honorable Mentions:
Bad Biology's "So You Wanna Make a Movie" (2008. Available on wax? No.) - Frank Henonletter, the man who made Basket Case, made his comeback with a film co-written by RA the Rugged Man. RA's been referencing Henenlotter's work for decades, and appeared on some of his DVD special features, so it was only a matter of time until they made a movie together, I guess. Unfortunately, the film's weird mix of exploitative horror and trashy Hip-Hop sensibilities just added up to something juvenile and disappointing. I mean, Vinnie Paz's acting is just like you'd think it would be. But given his participation, it was a given RA would also have a rap song for the credits, but it's not really about Bad Biology's story. Maybe that's just as well in this case. Instead it's about the hardships of making an independent film, in essence a theme song about the making of this film. That's an original slant, props for that, but by the time you hear it in its context, it just feels like more of everything that went wrong with this picture.
13 Ghosts' "Mirror Mirror" (2001. Available on wax? Nah.) - Neither a great movie nor a great rap theme song, but at least they tried. Rah Digga, who played a sizeable supporting role in the film, naturally comes back to rap up the closing credits. Unfortunately, it's not about the film's plot or horror at all; it's just about overcoming life's challenges. She does make a reference to seeing her grandmother again, like a ghost, and there's a little theremin-like sound in the track, so it feels like she's throwing in little token semi-references to the movie, but that's even worse, because it just makes it feel like a lazy, half-assed song. Like, be about ghosts or don't, but don't try to play both sides of the fence. Nice try, but nobody wants to hear club raps like "I can live like a baller" on a bloody horror movie.
Leprechaun In the Hood's "Ride Or Die" (2000. Available on wax? No.) - Obviously this movie had to get at least a mention. It's a campy mash0-up of horror and "hood" movies with a rapper named Postermaster P for a main character and Ice-T in a leading role. Leprechaun himself even raps at the end of the movie... but before the closing credits and the film's underwhelming outro song by some dudes called The Boom Brothers. It's not great, but they do at least include the leprechaun in their lyrics. Interestingly, Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood (the sixth actual Leprechaun movie) just plays traditional score over its closing credits, although of course it does have some rap on its soundtrack, including a song by Zion I.
Other films that didn't make the list but rate a mention include Psycho 3, which has a very strange little rap song tucked away on its soundtrack called "Dirty Street." Shark Night ends with a music video that starts after the closing credits where the film's lead actors make a terrible rap video (though fitting with the film's campy, junk TV nature). And Japanese pop rock band Sekai no Owari pretty much rapped (in English, no less) through the closing credits rap Attack On the Titan with their song called "Anti Hero," guest produced by Dan the Automator. But it's more iffy if the film counts as horror (it's more of a dystopian YA fantasy actioner), then if the song counts as Hip-Hop.
Also there was a 2000 film called The Convent, which I naively saw at a screening when I was young enough to believe that when the producers said their film was just like Evil Dead to expect something comparable. Anyway, Coolio had a small role in it as a cop, and the film ends with an original closing credits rap by him called "Show Me Love." But it wasn't a horror-related song at all, and a couple years later, he wound up sticking it on one of his albums called El Cool Magnifico.
Besides Scary Movie, there are other horror-related comedies with rap themes, including Ghostbusters II, which had songs by both Run DMC and Doug E Fresh. And there's the Addams Family movies, which made music videos and everything for their theme songs by Hammer and Tag Team. The screenshot at the top of this article is from M. Night Shymalan's The Visit (an unacknowledged knock-off of the 80's movie Grandmother's House), where the lead kid raps us out during the closing credits.
And finally, no I didn't forget. Tales From the Hood. What a disappointment. It should've had a soundtrack like The Fear, only with even bigger artists, which it sort of did. But instead of horrorcore/ scary songs, it's just dark hardcore and gangsta rap. The closing credits play Scarface/ Face Mob, and the title track is by Domino, who doesn't wind up rapping about anything scary at all, let alone something having to do with the actual film. Admittedly, it's a solid soundtrack album just taken as a collection of original songs by the day's biggest rap artists; but I just can't shake how let down I felt that it copped out since the day I first bought it.
Saturday, June 11, 2016
Sunday, May 29, 2016
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Fat Boy Back In Effect
In 1991, when FS Effect came out, I had no idea who they were or what their music sounded like. But I bought their album anyway. Why? Because this was after The Fat Boys had broken up. Prince Markie Dee said he was tired of being in a group people looked on as a joke. Also, he really wasn't so fat, at least compared to the other two - if he lost anymore weight, he was gonna stick out... but that probably wasn't so much on his mind. Anyway, he left, and we fans were left wondering what was he going to do now... We eventually found out that he was going to become a surprisingly successful, R&B-fused producer who'd even score a couple solo hits, more suited for Video LP ("kiss it or diss it?") than Rap City. But this was in that void, between The Fat Boys and The Soul Convention. He made his first appearance doing a guest verse on FS Effect's debut album.
Well, the group turned out to be a decent but fairly generic new jack swing group; and the reason Markie Dee chose to start his comeback here is pretty easy to guess. He was producing them. He didn't do their whole album, but he did several tracks, including their lead single and, of course, the song he appears on. I found out years later that I could've just bought the single, because Markie Dee's guest verse is the B-side. Oh well. Here it is now.
So the A-side is "Your Luvin'." It was also the first song on the album. They did have a second single ("I Wanna Be Your Lover," which features Christopher Williams singing circles around them) and a some exposure on the New Jack City soundtrack, but you can really tell Giant Records figured all of FS Effect was predicated on this one song. The full-length, So Deep It's Bottomless, was really just a formality to make the single more official. If this song was a hit, then maybe they'd put some more money into these guys and maybe stick with 'em for a while. But it wasn't, and their story's a pretty short one.
So how is it already? It's not bad. It's certainly well produced, with a lot of keyboards and smoothed out funk guitars played over a solid break beat. And there's some really nice R&B vocals for the hook, which all blends together seamlessly. I mean, a lot of heads are going to outright hate this just for being a new jack rap/R&B hybrid; but if you're open to the style, it's certainly a well put together example of it. Really, the only weak spot is the rapping. But that's a pretty big weak point, because all the MCs have super simple, stilted deliveries, and weak, contrived rhymes: "I like to think back to the days when I used to be trippin' about bein' engaged at a tender age. That made me remember the stage of years, when I was still wet behind the ears." They're clearly all trying to be Father MCs (who Markie Dee would also successfully produce for), but they just can't do it like he could.
But none of that shit's what we're here for, anyway. Flip this over to the B-side and we get "Mentally Stable." It's the album's hardcore track (think of the title track to Father MC's Father's Day), and it's the one where Markie Dee shows all these FS Effect guys how to rap. If you're interested, by the way, there were four guys: Joeseph Brim, Rich Love, Amery Ware and Carmel DJ EZ Lee. Yeah, surprisingly, they had a DJ, and he was probably the best part of the group. Certainly, his scratching on "I Wanna Be Your Lover" was the highlight of that single.
So yeah, think "Father's Day." It's hardcore, but not "Protect Ya Neck" hardcore. It's hardcore within the parameters of new jack swing: rolling piano loop, funky horn stabs, plenty of scratching by their DJ. Everybody says "motherfucker" at least once in their verse. And Markie Dee grabs the mic first to kill it. True Fat Boys aficionados will know that Markie Dee was always the beast of the trio in terms of rhyming. Granted, times have changed, bars have been raised... this surely isn't as impressive to fresh ears as it was back in '91, corny references stand out more now that everybody isn't doing them quite so much; but it was a genuinely exciting verse at the time. It was also still genuinely shocking to hear one of the Fat Boys declare "I'll kick your fuckin' ass" on a record. And the FS Effect guys... well, Markie clearly left them in the dust, but they do manage to pull their own weight at least enough to fill up the song without having it feel like it's hit any lulls or soft spots.
Now, the 12" features several mixes of both tracks, with promising titles like the Down Low Mix, Hip Hop Show or DK EZ Lee's Jeep Style... but, disappointingly, they're just overly fanciful ways to describe really basic radio, street and instrumental mixes. I was excited to hear the Bald Head version of "Mentally Stable" when I first brought this 12" home, but oh well. The song itself is still worth having, and the 12" single at least saves you the trouble of getting the whole album, which I'd reserve exclusively for die-hard new jack swing fans. Though if you like that kinda stuff, there are some well-sung hooks, fresh cutting and old school samples on there.
Well, the group turned out to be a decent but fairly generic new jack swing group; and the reason Markie Dee chose to start his comeback here is pretty easy to guess. He was producing them. He didn't do their whole album, but he did several tracks, including their lead single and, of course, the song he appears on. I found out years later that I could've just bought the single, because Markie Dee's guest verse is the B-side. Oh well. Here it is now.
So the A-side is "Your Luvin'." It was also the first song on the album. They did have a second single ("I Wanna Be Your Lover," which features Christopher Williams singing circles around them) and a some exposure on the New Jack City soundtrack, but you can really tell Giant Records figured all of FS Effect was predicated on this one song. The full-length, So Deep It's Bottomless, was really just a formality to make the single more official. If this song was a hit, then maybe they'd put some more money into these guys and maybe stick with 'em for a while. But it wasn't, and their story's a pretty short one.
So how is it already? It's not bad. It's certainly well produced, with a lot of keyboards and smoothed out funk guitars played over a solid break beat. And there's some really nice R&B vocals for the hook, which all blends together seamlessly. I mean, a lot of heads are going to outright hate this just for being a new jack rap/R&B hybrid; but if you're open to the style, it's certainly a well put together example of it. Really, the only weak spot is the rapping. But that's a pretty big weak point, because all the MCs have super simple, stilted deliveries, and weak, contrived rhymes: "I like to think back to the days when I used to be trippin' about bein' engaged at a tender age. That made me remember the stage of years, when I was still wet behind the ears." They're clearly all trying to be Father MCs (who Markie Dee would also successfully produce for), but they just can't do it like he could.
But none of that shit's what we're here for, anyway. Flip this over to the B-side and we get "Mentally Stable." It's the album's hardcore track (think of the title track to Father MC's Father's Day), and it's the one where Markie Dee shows all these FS Effect guys how to rap. If you're interested, by the way, there were four guys: Joeseph Brim, Rich Love, Amery Ware and Carmel DJ EZ Lee. Yeah, surprisingly, they had a DJ, and he was probably the best part of the group. Certainly, his scratching on "I Wanna Be Your Lover" was the highlight of that single.
So yeah, think "Father's Day." It's hardcore, but not "Protect Ya Neck" hardcore. It's hardcore within the parameters of new jack swing: rolling piano loop, funky horn stabs, plenty of scratching by their DJ. Everybody says "motherfucker" at least once in their verse. And Markie Dee grabs the mic first to kill it. True Fat Boys aficionados will know that Markie Dee was always the beast of the trio in terms of rhyming. Granted, times have changed, bars have been raised... this surely isn't as impressive to fresh ears as it was back in '91, corny references stand out more now that everybody isn't doing them quite so much; but it was a genuinely exciting verse at the time. It was also still genuinely shocking to hear one of the Fat Boys declare "I'll kick your fuckin' ass" on a record. And the FS Effect guys... well, Markie clearly left them in the dust, but they do manage to pull their own weight at least enough to fill up the song without having it feel like it's hit any lulls or soft spots.
Now, the 12" features several mixes of both tracks, with promising titles like the Down Low Mix, Hip Hop Show or DK EZ Lee's Jeep Style... but, disappointingly, they're just overly fanciful ways to describe really basic radio, street and instrumental mixes. I was excited to hear the Bald Head version of "Mentally Stable" when I first brought this 12" home, but oh well. The song itself is still worth having, and the 12" single at least saves you the trouble of getting the whole album, which I'd reserve exclusively for die-hard new jack swing fans. Though if you like that kinda stuff, there are some well-sung hooks, fresh cutting and old school samples on there.
Friday, September 28, 2012
The Real Sun City Show Is On the Second Stage
Remember "Sun City?" Okay... well, remember "We Are the World?" "Sun City" was one of those records that came on the heels of "We Are the World," with major artists of all musical genres coming together to make a joint record for a good cause. In the case of "Sun City," it was about ending apartheid. There were lots of big names, including Bob Dylan, Pat Benatar, Miles Davis, Lou Reed, Herbie Hancock, Hall & Oates, George Clinton, Bonnie Raitt, etc etc. But what made "Sun City" of a lot more interest to us here at Werner's is that it featured rappers! Melle Mel, Run DMC, Kurtis Blow, Afrika Bambaataa and DJ Cheese providing some cuts - now we're talking! And it's a lot more hip-hop with big 80's beats and producers like Keith LeBlanc.
But, still... how good is a song that features Kurtis Blow and Bonnie Raitt on the same track really going to be? As you can imagine, the rappers had their parts, essentially drifting in a sea of sappy pop music. So, you know, it's interesting, but we heads will really want to stick with "Self Destruction" and "Close the Crack House" to get our enormously collaborative, charitable kicks.
But "Sun City" wasn't just a single - even though that's all anybody remembers - it was a whole album. And while most of it is more of the same except a lot more underwhelming, there was a highlight. In a show of "we're just beginning to wrap our heads around the concept of political correctness in 1985," the producers of the Sun City album decided to take all of the black artists, and give them a solo song of their own. They didn't separate them by genre - the jazz, the rap, the reggae, is still all mushed together... but it's a lot more cohesive and less blandly poppy than the title track. Finally, we didn't have Kurtis passing the mic to Bonnie.
Despite being multi-genre'd, this isn't just more cohesive, but more hip-hop. Each MC gets a lot more time to flesh out verses, as opposed to quickly saying a short soundbite in unison with another rapper, so you can't even make out their individual voices and then clearing the stage, and this time around we get extra rappers. Scorpio is here and holy shit, it's The Fat Boys! ...Actually, if you listen to "Sun City" real close[what? so I have a little extra free time] you can hear a super brief sound clearly made by The Fat Boys right before Run DMC's second appearance. I'd bet you dollars to doughnuts that The Fat Boys were originally a part of this song and then cut out, perhaps because they were considered too much of a silly novelty act for the song? Or because their manager wanted too much money? Anyway, they're here on "Let Me See Your I.D." Unlike this "Sun City," which I'd only recommend to completists who have to have everything guys like Melle Mel laid their voices to, this song's actually worth your time.
Still... it's not perfect. Mostly because Gil Scott Heron has about half the vocal time on this song. Pretty much between every rap verse he comes on and does a spoken word bit... not even really spoken word like Saul Williams, but like, just self-indulgent structureless rambling. It's boring, sucks the life out of the song, and it even gets kind of insipid, "you ask somebody, 'where is the third world,' they go, 'oh yeah yeah, I know! it's a disco, Go up about three blocks and take a left.' Or they might tell you the third world is a new health food restaurant. I know the first time I heard somebody talkin' about there was trouble in the middle east, i thought they were talkin' about Pittsburgh." And that's it, then the hook comes in. But, still, here we a big, full verse by Mel, DJ Cheese providing cuts while Buff Love does a big human beatbox solo and Miles Davis blows his trumpet, Duke Bootee flexes a nice post-"Message" rhyme, Kurtis Blow, well... he was kinda off in his own world in 1985, it's pretty corny... but still, it's mostly good stuff.
Still, wouldn't it be great if there was a version that stripped away Heron's B.S.? And, okay, now you might be thinking, "Slow your roll, dude. You're talking about Gil Scott Heron like he's Marky Mark or something." I know, I know. I'm not disparaging his legacy and classics like "The Revolution Will Not Be Televised" or "Winter In America." Granted, as a purely hip-hop head, I spin Kane and Rakim instead of Heron for my musical enjoyment; but when I listen to "Revolution," I feel it, I get it. It's really fucking good. But his contribution here is nowhere on that level. Here he's jamming up the song like rush hour traffic.
But hey! There's actually a 12" that solves everything! Yes, "Let Me See Your I.D." was also released as a single. The A-side is just the album version, and there's also a Beat and Scratch mix on the flip. But the important part here is the Street Mix. Instrumentally, it's a bit more stripped down, which is mostly an improvement, though I do wind up missing a few nice instrumental bits from the original (Miles!). But the important thing is that they take out all the talky filler and give you just a flat out, 100% rap song. See, the important thing is now we finally have a song we can listen to in regular rotation. It's no longer a case of "well, if you sift through all the other stuff, there are some nice hip-hop nuggets that can be unearthed." This is a really good fucking hip-hop record! This changes it from something interesting for historians to a dope song for any fan of old school rap.
Seriously, if you like stuff from 1985, get this 12"; you'll definitely be happy. And it even comes in a picture cover because it had a budget. :)
But, still... how good is a song that features Kurtis Blow and Bonnie Raitt on the same track really going to be? As you can imagine, the rappers had their parts, essentially drifting in a sea of sappy pop music. So, you know, it's interesting, but we heads will really want to stick with "Self Destruction" and "Close the Crack House" to get our enormously collaborative, charitable kicks.
But "Sun City" wasn't just a single - even though that's all anybody remembers - it was a whole album. And while most of it is more of the same except a lot more underwhelming, there was a highlight. In a show of "we're just beginning to wrap our heads around the concept of political correctness in 1985," the producers of the Sun City album decided to take all of the black artists, and give them a solo song of their own. They didn't separate them by genre - the jazz, the rap, the reggae, is still all mushed together... but it's a lot more cohesive and less blandly poppy than the title track. Finally, we didn't have Kurtis passing the mic to Bonnie.
Despite being multi-genre'd, this isn't just more cohesive, but more hip-hop. Each MC gets a lot more time to flesh out verses, as opposed to quickly saying a short soundbite in unison with another rapper, so you can't even make out their individual voices and then clearing the stage, and this time around we get extra rappers. Scorpio is here and holy shit, it's The Fat Boys! ...Actually, if you listen to "Sun City" real close[what? so I have a little extra free time] you can hear a super brief sound clearly made by The Fat Boys right before Run DMC's second appearance. I'd bet you dollars to doughnuts that The Fat Boys were originally a part of this song and then cut out, perhaps because they were considered too much of a silly novelty act for the song? Or because their manager wanted too much money? Anyway, they're here on "Let Me See Your I.D." Unlike this "Sun City," which I'd only recommend to completists who have to have everything guys like Melle Mel laid their voices to, this song's actually worth your time.
Still... it's not perfect. Mostly because Gil Scott Heron has about half the vocal time on this song. Pretty much between every rap verse he comes on and does a spoken word bit... not even really spoken word like Saul Williams, but like, just self-indulgent structureless rambling. It's boring, sucks the life out of the song, and it even gets kind of insipid, "you ask somebody, 'where is the third world,' they go, 'oh yeah yeah, I know! it's a disco, Go up about three blocks and take a left.' Or they might tell you the third world is a new health food restaurant. I know the first time I heard somebody talkin' about there was trouble in the middle east, i thought they were talkin' about Pittsburgh." And that's it, then the hook comes in. But, still, here we a big, full verse by Mel, DJ Cheese providing cuts while Buff Love does a big human beatbox solo and Miles Davis blows his trumpet, Duke Bootee flexes a nice post-"Message" rhyme, Kurtis Blow, well... he was kinda off in his own world in 1985, it's pretty corny... but still, it's mostly good stuff.
Still, wouldn't it be great if there was a version that stripped away Heron's B.S.? And, okay, now you might be thinking, "Slow your roll, dude. You're talking about Gil Scott Heron like he's Marky Mark or something." I know, I know. I'm not disparaging his legacy and classics like "The Revolution Will Not Be Televised" or "Winter In America." Granted, as a purely hip-hop head, I spin Kane and Rakim instead of Heron for my musical enjoyment; but when I listen to "Revolution," I feel it, I get it. It's really fucking good. But his contribution here is nowhere on that level. Here he's jamming up the song like rush hour traffic.
But hey! There's actually a 12" that solves everything! Yes, "Let Me See Your I.D." was also released as a single. The A-side is just the album version, and there's also a Beat and Scratch mix on the flip. But the important part here is the Street Mix. Instrumentally, it's a bit more stripped down, which is mostly an improvement, though I do wind up missing a few nice instrumental bits from the original (Miles!). But the important thing is that they take out all the talky filler and give you just a flat out, 100% rap song. See, the important thing is now we finally have a song we can listen to in regular rotation. It's no longer a case of "well, if you sift through all the other stuff, there are some nice hip-hop nuggets that can be unearthed." This is a really good fucking hip-hop record! This changes it from something interesting for historians to a dope song for any fan of old school rap.
Seriously, if you like stuff from 1985, get this 12"; you'll definitely be happy. And it even comes in a picture cover because it had a budget. :)
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Friday, October 31, 2008
Nightmare On Elm Street raps, part 2
^Video blog!!
(Second video of all-original Halloween content on the new blog.)
Happy Halloween, everybody!
Monday, October 20, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
There's Three of Them, But They're Not the Beatles

In fact, a rap group had acquired the rights to a Beatles song long before the Wu's mis-announcement. See, the Clan originally claimed that "the first single from [8 Diagrams] is the first legal sample of the Beatles ever used, appearing as the backing track to "The Heart Gently Weeps.'" on their myspace. But they later back-tracked to admitting they had George Harrison's son Dhani Harrison and John Frusciante of The Red Hot Chili Peppers replay some of the song's elements, because they couldn't clear the rights to the original. But years before all this, manager Charles Stettler went through some major negotiations to get the rights to The Beatles' "Baby, You're a Rich Man" from Michael Jackson (who owned the rights to their catalog at the time) for his superstar group, The Fat Boys.
Their version of The Beatles' "Baby, You're a Rich Man" (the b-side to 1967's "All You Need Is Love" on Capitol Records, pictured above) was featured on the soundtrack to their film, The Disorderlies in 1987. The soundtrack came out on Polydor Records, the major label that scooped them up from Sutra Records that same year. The Fat Boys also perform "Baby, You're a Rich Man" in a scene about midway through the film. And it was finally released as a 45bpm (even the 12" was 45, yes) single on Polydor in '88.
The song was produced by Paul Gurvitz (who also produced their cover of "Wipeout," which actually featured The Beach Boys), and was edited by Albert Cabrera of The Latin Rascalz. It opens with just a sytar and Buff Love beat-boxing, and then the beat kicks it into a full-fledged Beatles rap cover! The writing credits only name P. McCartney and J. Lennon, but somehow i doubt they had a hand in Kool Rock Ski or Prince Markie Dee's rhymes:
"Now rich livin' is def
So funky fresh
Ya have so much in life
And won't settle for less
You can live like a king
And pursue your career
To be a billion - or trillion -
or zillionaire
You can have what you want
Or what you desire
So much money
You could set it on fire!
If I was rich
I'd be a selfish star
Have champagne for breakfast
With caviar!
Girls at my feet
And gold on my neck
And when I get real bored
I'll write out checks!
A fourteen karat
Gold solid band
And a bag full of money
The rest by hand!
I'll cruise around the city
In my black Rolls Royce
And choose the finest lady
Of my choice!
I'll get real ill
But won't get greedy...
Donate half of it
To the needy!
But if I ain't set
And not legit
Get the girls off my feet
And take the gold off my neck!"
Interestingly, he's not credited on the label anywhere, but Dweezil Zappa played guitar on this song. There's an interview with him on IdiotBastard.Supanet.com, where he talks about it, "I think it was on a soundtrack, but I haven’t heard that since I played on it. I remember that was the shortest session I ever did. I went in, they played me the song. It was tuned down a half step and my guitar I tune to A4-40, and so it was like a really weird key for me to play in at that point. It was like B-flat I had to play in, because my guitar was not in tune with the track. And I remember just playing one thing, and once I got to a certain point on the neck, I got confused as to what key I was in because it wasn’t standard tuning. I started doing really weird stuff. And they kept it. That was it. Just one take of the solo. And they said. 'That was it! Great. No problem. Thanks very much.' OK."
The 12" includes three mixes: the "!2" Version," "Single Version," and the "Album Version." Except for the fact that the "Single Version" is heavily edited down to about half the length of the other two, the three mixes aren't all that different. The actual 7" (pictured above), by the way, only features the "Single Version" and has a unique b-side the 12" doesn't have: "Jellyroll" (a song that would later be featured on their album Coming Back Hard Again).
...And if after you get this record, it still hasn't been enough, then you'll just have to track down the square- and star-shaped vinyl singles of "The Beatles Rap" by The Quoreymen. That'll finish you off, for sure.
Finally, before I close this, a quick note to my regular readers: I'll be going away for the next couple of days to speak at The Connecticut Film Festival (which is also screening my first film, Lunch Break). So there won't be another update for a couple of days. But I hope I've left you with a good one. ;)
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