InstaRapFlix #34: I'm Still Here

I wasn't going to bother with this film... It was evident the "Joaquin Phoenix is a rapper schtick" was a hoax - and not a very interesting one - even before people knew there was a movie attached to it. But hey, it's streaming for free, so what the heck, just watch I'm Still Here (Netflix rating: 2 1/2 stars) and get it over with.

The rapping and music is terrible, of course (that's half the gag, after all ...I guess). The characters are unlikeable. The conflict is uninteresting. The depiction of reality is unconvincing (perhaps most damning, the acting is bad). The humor is trite. The message is heavy-handed, but... well, okay, the message is sort of interesting at least.

So, okay, you've got two self indulgent celebs (Joaquin Phoenix and Casey Affleck) roping in a bunch of other dopey celebs (Mos Def, Ben Stiller, P Diddy etc) to make a stupid, shallow indictment of how self indulgent celebrity culture is stupid and shallow, and everyone who gets roped into it is a dope. So, they're essentially saying you're wasting your time by watching crap like this... and I have to admit, they have a point.

You know how they say that if you're being trolled on the internet, no matter how you respond, they're winning... because all they're looking for is to get a reaction out of you? So the only way to win is not to play? Well, this movie is a case of celebrities trolling the general public. If you watch it, talk about it, blog about it[d'oh!], or spend time out of your day thinking about it, then you've been trolled.

But what's the rap nerd perspective? That's what we're all here for... Are there any great cameos or clips of interesting hip-hop artists tucked away in here? Not really. Because it's all about celebrity status, the only artist we see performing (besides "JP") is Jamie Foxx leading an audience into a call and response with his and Joaquin's names. Otherwise, all the cameos and appearances are actor buddies, not MCs. So yeah, nothing worthwhile here, even streamed for free.